Monday, 31 December 2012

So, What is sexy? (ARTICLE)

What is sexy? It's a basic question yet it has no definitive answer. Every era has a different ideology of what is sexy and, today it seems, there is much emphasis on a particular look for women to have which is deemed "sexy". Blonde hair, small waist, large-ish bum, large breasts, veneered teeth, fake tan with a smokey-eye makeup look (usually Mac) typically seems to be the number one choice for modern day, traditional sexiness - that's according to the young male demographic of the country. Basically, the Page Three/Playboy image.

Whilst it may be a "hot" look, I have problem with that image alone being the preferred choice. I believe you can have sexiness throughout all women's shapes and sizes - even ages - and to me sexiness is something much, much deeper than a superficial look. It's a fact that men and women view sex differently, so it must be that both genders view sexiness differently? As time goes on I feel more and more women are either full-on striving for that "sexy" look - you just have to look at some of the girls on a Saturday night at the clubs to realise this - whilst on the other side, is those women who are so opposed to that image that they will go out of their way to avoid resembling it.
For example, the dress sense of some girls is 'less is more' with tight, short dresses and a ton of makeup on. Whilst other women will almost dull themselves down to obtain an androgynous look. It's the latter which used to agree with me the most, I wanted men to find more in me than my looks to be considered sexy and desirable. That's less the case now, I actually think that it was more my need to be taken seriously as a young woman which made me tune-down my natural femininity. I don't think I have to do that anymore and I have personally found a great love in more 'girly' things such as makeup and beauty (hence my lovely Stellar Skin Blog).

It seems to me that there is actually a huge difference in women being sexy and a woman's sexuality. Maybe that's where the confusion lies. So many young women seem to believe that by posing for Page 3 or becoming a Playmate at Hugh Hefners Mansion is "an expression of their sexuality as a woman". I completely disagree. I think that a woman's sexuality is something which comes from such a deep, meaningful, intellectual and personal space that it cannot be simply portrayed in a basic "tits out" image for a 'Lads Mag'. The human brain is our biggest sexual organ and we all know that, for example, it takes a Hell of a lot more mental arousal for a woman to orgasm than physical. And a woman's personal sexual pleasure is the biggest part of their sexuality. It would be like saying that porn is a true representation of how to pleasure a woman, it's simply untrue.

Now, I have no problem with women who have "sexy" jobs or go topless/nude or anything like that, however I do when it's suppose to somehow represent a woman's sexuality. That's a lie. Just call it "posing in a modern day, preferred sexy image" or even "entertainment", and leave it at that (it's not as if the men are looking into something as complex as the female sexual mind when they perv over these pictures, is it?). I also don't think it helps the situation when tabloids such as The Sun have little comment boxes on the Page 3 image directly, quoting the model as basically "having an opinion on something that's happening in the world". I find that to be in extremely poor taste as I have, many a time, been in the company of men who have blatantly taken the mickey out of these girls for what they had had to say. That sort of thing fuels sexism and we still have too much of that in our culture.

If we look the other way round and think about what women find sexy in men, it usually is something more than the superficial. Let's be honest though, like most of my peers, I look at men like Channing Tatum and think he's sex on a stick sexy. However, it's the added qualities that makes me find him even more attractive, such as him playing roles in which he appears to have such a nice personality etc. It's like when I first met my boyfriend, I did find him physically sexy but there were also these other emotionally attractive characteristics within him - from seeing him play with his little niece to having as strong an interest in politics as I do - which made him irresistible to me.

Overall, I think that all women should feel as sexy as they want to. They shouldn't feel so under pressure to live up to this faux-sexiness which has been engraved into our subconscious by tacky media outlets. I really think that if women can achieve their own ideals of sexiness primarily without male influence, then it can become something much more universal with less competition. And the boys will defiantly find you much more irresistible.

That's my argument.

(image via GoogleImages)


  1. Nice Blog :)! im a new follower!!


  2. I have nominated you for the Liebster Award, go to my blog to check it out :)
    Laura xx

    1. Oh wow, thank you! I'm not sure what the award is all about but I will check it out!



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